One day during the time when Michael Jackson’s’ “Black or White” was being vastly over played on local radio stations and people didn’t think “Summer of 69” was rock, I was “tripping” at a friends place. We were checking out new material (after slaving two months to collect Rs. 250 for the audio cassette) R got recorded from either Trax or by Weeramanthri. First song on side B was “Blackhole Sun” by Soundgarden. The second song broke my trip. It was grunge like I’ve never heard before. The crash metal guitar and the vocals were passionate and riveting at the same time. A combination that I think, at that time, was lacking even in the most popular rock band, Guns N Roses, which went from hard rock to pussy rock with songs like November Rain and Patience (maybe with the exception of the song “I use to love her”). Thus was my introduction to Kurt Cobain and Nirvana. The song was “Smells like Teen Sprit”.
A talented and creative child, Cobain was misdiagnosed as "hyperactive" and prescribed the cocaine-like and highly addictive Ritalin. Side effects include insomnia, nausea, abdominal pain, hallucinations and a predisposition to later cocaine use. Sedatives were prescribed to counter the insomnia. The progression to street drugs, including heroin, was a given. Compounding the Ritalin were untreated chronic medical conditions that affected him his entire life, including a "burning, nauseous" stomach, which Cobain said heroin "quenched." He enrolled in a
A Dying Plea
To Boddah
“Speaking from the tongue of an experienced simpleton who obviously would rather be an emasculated, infantile complain-ee. This note should be pretty easy to understand.
All the warnings from the punk rock 101 courses over the years, since my first introduction to the, shall we say, ethics involved with independence and the embracement of your community has proven to be very true. I haven't felt the excitement of listening to as well as creating music along with reading and writing for too many years now. I feel guity beyond words about these things.
For example when we're back stage and the lights go out and the manic roar of the crowds begins., it doesn't affect me the way in which it did for Freddie Mercury, who seemed to love, relish in the the love and adoration from the crowd which is something I totally admire and envy. The fact is, I can't fool you, any one of you. It simply isn't fair to you or me. The worst crime I can think of would be to rip people off by faking it and pretending as if I'm having 100% fun. Sometimes I feel as if I should have a punch-in time clock before I walk out on stage. I've tried everything within my power to appreciate it (and I do,God, believe me I do, but it's not enough). I appreciate the fact that I and we have affected and entertained a lot of people. It must be one of those narcissists who only appreciate things when they're gone. I'm too sensitive. I need to be slightly numb in order to regain the enthusiasms I once had as a child.
On our last 3 tours, I've had a much better appreciation for all the people I've known personally, and as fans of our music, but I still can't get over the frustration, the guilt and empathy I have for everyone. There's good in all of us and I think I simply love people too much, so much that it makes me feel too fucking sad. The sad little, sensitive, unappreciative, Pisces, Jesus man. Why don't you just enjoy it? I don't know!
I have a goddess of a wife who sweats ambition and empathy and a daughter who reminds me too much of what i used to be, full of love and joy, kissing every person she meets because everyone is good and will do her no harm. And that terrifies me to the point to where I can barely function. I can't stand the thought of
I have it good, very good, and I'm grateful, but since the age of seven, I've become hateful towards all humans in general. Only because it seems so easy for people to get along that have empathy. Only because I love and feel sorry for people too much I guess.
Thank you all from the pit of my burning, nauseous stomach for your letters and concern during the past years. I'm too much of an erratic, moody baby! I don't have the passion anymore, and so remember, it's better to burn out than to fade away.
Peace, love, empathy.
Kurt Cobain
Frances and Courtney, I'll be at your alter.
Please keep going Courtney, for
For her life, which will be so much happier without me.
I LOVE YOU, I LOVE YOU!”
April 5th marked the twelfth death anniversary of Kurt Cobain.
5 comments:
You know there's a conspiracy theory about whether he did commit suicide or not right? Also, there are a lot of fishy things about his suicude. He wasn't acting weird or anything on the day he blew his brains out. I think he previously tried to "commit suicide" in Italy or something like that but there was some talk of someone drugging his drink or something like that.
Have a google for it, I don't know the exact details.
A number of people strongly felt that Kurt's death was nothing short of homicide.Some felt this way cuz of all the discrepancies in the police report but a more substantial proof comes from the amount of heroin found in cobains blood during the autopsy. Apparantly his blood contained 1.52 milligrams of heroin per litre.Many people, including Tom Grant, the private investigatore hired by Courtney love, adamantly believed that there was no way Kurt could have shot himself when this far gone. Of course, many critics see this as bullshit and we all know how much the world loves controvesy. Who knows.You should watch Kurt & Courtney.
Kurt Cobain is a genius
I believe you mean 'was' a genius:)...the rumour was that prep kid listened to a heavy metal song backwards..which had 'secret' lyrics that caused him to pop his parents, right.
Kurt Cobain is a lot of things - hero, villain, melodic genius, a powerchord merchant, spokesman for an entire generation...
The media have used all the above to describe him. But I don't care. To me, he and his band of lunatics, Dave and Krist, are the reason I went off on a crazy journey of discovering music that matters.
The moment I heard the Smells like Teen Spirit riff, I knew my perception of music would change. And that maybe a cliche, but it is the truth.
Kurt made me love music, made me yearn to discover the most obscure bands and musicians.
Guns N Roses and Metallica - the first two rock bands that I liked - never made me want to do that. For that, Kurt will always have a place in my heart.
Thank you, good writer sir, for reminding me why I love the band and the man.
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