Eleven Things I Shit Bricks Just Thinking About.

1. Breaking my leg again (May God have mercy!).
2. Being lonely (I hate watching porn stars grow old).
3. Hooking up with somebody and still feeling lonely (No, a joint is not a place).
4. Hooking up and finding out that she is a man (I watched Transamarica over the weekend and it scared the living fuck out of me).
5. Loosing mom (I dare not ask her if I’m in her list).
6. Having children (As long as I don’t have to be in the labour room I think I would be sorted).
7. 35 and still going to Clancys (Get the fuck outta here you old fart).
8. 35 and not hooked up yet (You know, when I was 28 I thought this was bad but now I think you’re young till you’re 40. Arrrgh!!!).
9. Getting married again (You know God is asking you to fuck off when he gives two moms-in-law in the same lifetime).
10. Migrating (I hate cops who do their jobs)
11. In the ocean with a Great White coming at me (This I don’t need to explain).